I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
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Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
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Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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