Non-Jews are for practice
Pants 0. Shit 1.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
