Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
