we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize