420 ftw
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
