...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize