he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize