maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
