I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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