I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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