The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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