Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
