I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
