Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
We left an ass print on the piano.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
