Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
