No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
