Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
