She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
