i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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