Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
