DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
