I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
