I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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