I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
