get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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