She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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