is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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