AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize