Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
