one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i think i have herpe
just one?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
