I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize