Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
