worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
