Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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