Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
