so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
