well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
