yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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