people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
