some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
