This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
