I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
