is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
