Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Randomize
