i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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