So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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