p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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