she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
