I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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