love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
