i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I think I just shit out all my problems.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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